Amaranth
by Sckitzo and Insomniac
Summary: The biggest problem she had was that she was hopelessly and dangerously in love with him just as much as she hated him. But is whatever it is that's inside her heart enough for him to keep her alive? KabutoOC.


Amaranth

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Amaranth is a plant with green leaves and red stems that grow out with plenty of flowers. It is also known as the Love-lies-bleeding plant because of how its shooting stems and small red clustered flowers resemble blood seeping out from the plant.

Insomniac: My fascination with Kabuto is never ending. The guy's loyalty is something I've always wanted to experiment with thus resulting into a sugar fest in the middle of the night after about three cups of tea and a handful of some bite-sized chocolate. KabutoOC. Beta'd by Sckitzo. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I own nooooothing.

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Ren gazed out of her window thoughtfully, her fingers running through her crimson hair and twisting the locks into a habitual plait. She could hear the crickets chirping from outside as the moonlight turned bleak from being blocked by a rolling cloud. Konoha was at peace tonight. Nothing seemed to disturb that. The herbalist retreated from the window of her house back to where her work table was. Various plants in pots and dried leaves hanging on lines adorned the small room.

With a sigh, she pulled the sleeves of her deep blue yukata back in order to finish the last of her orders that night. There must be a bug going around town. The shop downstairs was unusually busy that day with many people who have been asking for medicine to treat an upset stomach and headaches. She'll have to ask the Godaime about that later, seeing that Shizune had come in earlier with a request for the same materials for the remedy. Ren picked up the pestle and began grinding a few leaves in the mortar before adding a few rose hips to the dark green paste. An oil lamp flickers its eager flame from the corner of the table, being the only source of light in the room this late night.

A gust of wind blew through her window, rustling through the leaves and herbs. The young woman's movements suddenly froze when a new presence joined her in the room. Ren felt her breath get caught in her throat for a moment before she was able to breathe again. Without acknowledging the intruder, she continued mashing the mixture in the stone container. She then scooped out its contents and replaced it onto a large fresh leaf to be wrapped.

"I need some aconite and some water lily root."

Ren lifted her gray eyes from her work table to glance back at the silver haired man that now stood with her in the dim room. She turned away from him and finished packaging up the paste after securing it with some twine. "Help yourself," she replied nonchalantly as she scooped up more of the medicine onto another leaf. "I have to warn you though. The aconite is still a few weeks from being in season yet so it might be a little green unless you're trying to poison someone."

She heard him chuckle lightly at her words as he began foraging for supplies under her permission. "Is this dried hibiscus?" he inquired curiously. "I don't think I've seen you have this for a while."

"It's suddenly a popular choice for tea. I keep most of my stock downstairs," she shrugged, listening to his quiet footsteps cross the room to inspect the various jars she had on a shelf. He always comes to her home whenever there was something he couldn't find on his own. She never asks what he uses them for and he never tells her. It was probably better that way. Their strictly customer-provider relationship has been strained more than once before. One time when she found out who he had been working for. Another, when he had kissed her. More than once actually.

"Ren."

The young woman tilted her head to see him. "Hai Kabuto?" She stiffened slightly when she realized that he had managed to sneak up on her so that he was directly behind her. His coal eyes gazed at her passively from behind his glass frames. A smirk crept up his lips, making her scowl at him impatiently for distracting her from her work. "Are you quite done replenishing your supplies for as you can see, I still have orders to finish," she asked.

She heard him laugh the second time that night while his arm came snaking around her waist. "Yes but I'm interested in what _you_ are doing," he replied cheekily into her ear, causing a shiver to run down her spine from his warm breath.

Their relationship was a juxtaposed one. He came into her shop one day, the same day in the past few years for some materials. She recognized him as one of the people who came for the chunin exams. For a while, there was nothing between them. It wasn't until he ran into her in the woods when she was looking for some mushrooms did he really notice her. They had a pleasant conversation, enjoying each other's company as they shared tips and suggestions about medicinal herbs and remedies.

The next time he had wandered into her home was a few months later. What was different was that there were no chunin exams and that it was late into the night when he came stumbling through her window. He had been wounded and bleeding. She was convinced he may have been poisoned as well. As a healer, she worked her best to treat his injuries. Not once did she question what their causes were nor did he tell her what had happened. He disappeared quickly enough once morning came, escaping her when she fell asleep.

The following month, he showed up at her door again. He had broken his arm and too weak to heal it himself. Just like the first time, she treated his wounds without any questions and he never said a word. She caught him getting ready to leave however but she knew better than to stop him. Instead, she gave him a small pack with some supplies, asking him to be careful. He only smiled at her before taking off.

Six months passed before he visited her yet again. Fortunately he wasn't injured but he had somehow broken into her shop, looking for feverfew and san leaves. He had failed to visit her during the last chunin exams and the recent Hokage had been killed. It was during the fiasco during the chunin exams did she discover who he was. Seeds of fear and doubt dug deep into her heart while she mourned with the rest of Konoha for the loss of the Hokage. She knew Kabuto could have killed her then when she found him in her store but strangely enough, he didn't. Instead, he had surprised her by kissing her deeply as if apologizing sheepishly before pinching a nerve in her neck that forced her into unconsciousness. When she woke up, she was lying in her bed with several coins on her side table in reparations for the things he had taken.

The next time he dropped by, she had been working on making an ointment for poison ivy. A reckless boy had somehow managed to run through the bush without realizing what it was until the itching began. He simply went in through the window of her workroom, almost causing her to paralyze him with a six inch long medic needle when he shocked her. He was genuinely surprised by her display of defense. Ren was more stunned however, to see that the intruder was him. She was angry at him for his traitorous acts but also hated him for his choices. Her heart was feeling a completely different thing though. Despite her rational thinking, her chest tightened with the conflicting emotions. She couldn't stop the blush from creeping from her cheeks as the memory of their kiss seeped back into her mind.

He only smiled at her furious accusations and threats before gripping her wrist and pulling her into their second kiss. In her mind, she wanted to break away and run. Her body betrayed her by bringing her into tears of anger and relief. She ended up collapsing in his comforting embrace, sobbing and close to hysterics at the realization of the mess they were sinking further deeper and deeper in. Kabuto only repeatedly whispered her name as he rubbed the nape of her neck gently. Moments before the sun rose, Ren shut her eyes from the light and listened to the silver haired nin's heartbeat. His arms were around her, his hand rubbing her back in circles. In her heart and amidst her silent tears, she truly wished that the sweet lies he promised into her ear were real.

The visits continued. Sometimes it was only for a quick supply stop. Other times, it was to escape the world for even a little while. For the most part, whenever he was around, they spoke little of his occupation. It was almost like a silent promise that came with their fragile trust that was only supported by lies. The moment he would enter that same window, Ren could not bear to see him as anything else but the young man she met a few years ago in the woods.

They both knew that she could reveal him to the others. They both knew how they could be both killed, either at the hands of the shinobi or Orochimaru's men. But what bothered Ren the most was that she knew this brittle safety between them could be shattered anytime. She didn't understand why he hadn't killed her or more importantly, why she hasn't given him up yet. He was a dangerous man whose crimes made her skin crawl at the mere thought of them. How then could she harbor him in her home let alone, in her arms?

Ren swallowed a difficult lump as she felt the heat emitting from his body upon the close contact she was having with him. "Shouldn't you be going back to whoever it is you're working for now?"

"You mean Orochimaru-sama?" His grip tightened around her. He was nuzzling at her neck now, making her tenser by the second. But she never pushed him away. Nor did she want to. His familiar scent was almost intoxicating, his caress both gentle and lethal. She swallowed another nervous lump as her shaky hands tried to continue what they had started with the mortar and pestle.

"So it's still him?"

She felt him grin against the skin by her ear. "Did you expect anyone else?"

"From what you have told me last time, I thought you had gone and left him already."

The soft chuckle that brushed against her ear was dark this time, almost forcing her to shudder. "Maybe. Maybe not. But at the moment, my loyalties are to Orochimaru-sama."

"Aren't you afraid?" she questioned curiously and cautiously. She often didn't trust the words that came out of this man's mouth. There would be times where she would be just about ready to fall into his strong arms and stay there until he had to leave. Other times, the reality of his ruthless eyes would wake her from their daydreams and she would be terrified of him. Of him and his secrets and his cruel hands. Whenever this realization would surface, Kabuto would quickly drown her with more of his heartbreaking affections. This was their time, he would tell her. Nothing else mattered.

"Iie."

"Doushite?"

Kabuto's free hand came up and tilted her chin up for her to meet his eyes once more. A cold smirk was playing upon his lips as his eyes glinted with twisted delight. "Because. It's all a game." Ren felt herself tremble under that terrifying gaze. Reality was breaking her again.

"A game?" she repeated breathlessly. He nodded, his thumb grazing her lower lip. "Hai Ren. A game," he murmured leisurely. "It is only the matter of who will survive. My strategy, of course, is to conquer all through wit." Her eyes fell shut as she turned her head away, his hand still cupping her face. "Betrayal is the key used to break away from fruitless relationships and onto more rewarding ones."

"Just what exactly are you trying to accomplish Kabuto?" Ren whispered, eyes still shut and brow furrowed in worried thought.

He kissed her cheek lightly. "Do you really want to know?"

Ren's gray orbs fluttered open to look back at him in confusion. She bit her lip for a moment, considering his question and weighing the odds of him actually telling her. "Will you tell me the truth?" she finally asked. Kabuto's face twisted into a bitter smile while he rubbed a few strands of her hair between his fingers.

"In that case…" He trailed off, waiting for her reaction. She raised a delicate brow. "Hi-mit-su," he finished almost childishly in a low voice, breaking the syllables of the word as if he were laying out the foundations for an elaborate lie. Ren shook her head before resuming her work. She felt his attention still fixated on her as she tried to wrap another package for a customer.

"Do you trust me?" he suddenly asked.

"No."

The answer left her lips without her even considering it. The silver haired man laughed at her response. "Good."

"Do you trust me?" she then questioned; her hands moving to hold herself as her heart leapt from her chest. His reply came just as quickly and as certain as hers.

"No."

And with that, he turned her around and swiftly caught her lips in a deep kiss. Ren swore her heart stopped for a second before it started racing against her rib cage as her arms automatically found their way around his neck. One of his hands had undone her braid and tangled itself into her crimson locks. His arm held her securely as he forced her back against a wall. She couldn't understand how this man could make her melt like this. She didn't know why his touch had the power to leave her flushed and breathless and at the same time, make her skin crawl in fear and disgust.

The terrible realization came to her that moment. The truth was that she was hopelessly and dangerously in love him just as much as she hated him.

He was a monster and at the same time he was a man.

He was a spy but he was also a friend.

He was a traitor and yet he was her lover.

The ache in her chest made it clear to her. She may not believe him but she had no doubt in her heart that she would give her life for him.

He broke the kiss gently, leaving them both panting softly for air. He gazed into her eyes searchingly, almost caringly. Ren leaned back against the wall for support, her head spinning from the clashing emotions that he had caused in her. She looked up into his dark eyes, almost hoping that maybe he only really was just a man who had walked into her shop one day. She had wished more than once before that maybe he was just a man who shared her interest in medicine who had that kind smile and encouraging laugh. She had wished that maybe they could just be happy together somehow.

"Gomen ne."

"What for?"

It took only two words to break the most important rule of their arrangement. "I lied." She admitted her misplaced trust in him, quietly and in resignation. She cleaved the cornerstone of lies on which their fabricated relationship existed upon by this one simple truth. It didn't matter how many times she just wished that this dream was real. She was hopelessly falling deeper into a fatal end, stretching out her hands for a fate that simply didn't exist for them. His eyes clouded in a strange emotion that she had never seen on his face before.

"I was hoping you weren't," he replied, his tone turning cold as a flicker of rage sparked in his dark eyes. Her heart ached sharply in her chest. Perhaps, she had been mistaken.

He suddenly broke away from her, walking away to inspect a plant with deep red stems with puffs of flowers trailing out of its pot. "Ren?"

"Hai?" she replied softly, watching him quietly as he stretched out his hand for her.

"What do you call this?" he inquired, nodding to the creeping red bush. Ren followed his gaze in confusion. "Amaranth." She approached him slowly and she felt his hand grasp hers. He tilted his head back towards her, his face unreadable at this point. "Doesn't it have another name?"

Ren swallowed tightly as the words escaped her lips, barely a whisper, "Love-lies-bleeding."

He pulled her forward unexpectedly. The sudden pain that came from the cold kunai piercing through her stomach somehow didn't surprise her as much as the cruel and bitter smile that crept up his lips. His coal eyes watched the agony of her shattering heart blurred her gray orbs with tears.

"You should have never trusted me."

_Betrayal is the key used to break away from fruitless relationships and onto more rewarding ones._

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Insomniac: Moral of the story? Never trust Kabuto :P

Fin: 2:06 a.m.


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